Thankful For What? and Love Even Who? Teach Me and Show Me How Lord!

Jesus Himself stated that all the commands of God which He has given for good (because He alone knows what is best for us) can be summed up in two commands alone.  1) Love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and 2) Love our neighbor as ourselves.  (Matthew 22:37-40).  Sounds easy enough doesn't it?  Easier said than done that is.  I often read these Scriptures with wonderful warm fuzzies and then seconds later am hit with the reality of the command in comparison to the reality of the human heart--especially my own.  Of course I love God.  However, am I loving Him with all that I am and all that I have above all my human worldly pursuits and ambitions?  Of course I love others.  However, am I loving only those who love me and treat me kindly when it is to my own benefit?  What about those who are my enemies?  What about those who are unkind to me?  What about those who treated me wrongly and unfairly? Do I show them love inwardly as well as in action?  Jesus commands that we love not only those who love us, but those who we would classify as our enemies and not only love them but bless them and pray for them.  (Luke 6:27-28).  None of this can be accomplished and done on our own relying on our own sufficiency, but only in asking God to show us how to do the impossible in His sufficiency.  God hears and answers and provides the supernatural strength to be who He asks us to be.  This is where the battle of my life and heart have been in the past few months.
God has given me the gift and the passion to be a teacher as ministry at church, but also as ministry and a job in the public school system.  Every year God gives me 90 plus students and their families to love and to serve and to teach with the heart of Christ.  It is not an easy job.  It has its ups and downs.  It is a job of endurance and labor of love.  However, I would not change it for the world.  It has always been my belief based upon the Sovereign control of the Lord that no one is my life by accident.  My God entrusts my students to me for His reasons.  Every year I learn just as much from them as I hope and pray they learn from me. 
This year, the lessons that I have learned from some of them (and the Lord) have been born out of some of the deepest and darkest pain that I ever felt in some time.  Students that I have loved and have worked hard to serve worked together to use the internet and technology to spread a cyberbully campaign in order to make fun of me, my personality, my faith, and my teaching.  It went on without my knowledge for months though I could feel its effects as I taught in my classroom and walked the halls of school (there were issues and prayers for wisdom, guidance, and direction since mid September).  When the full circle of all that happened came to the surface, I was beyond brokenhearted and crushed.  It was the week before thanksgiving as well. 
All I kept thinking of was God's Word that states to be "thankful in all things" and to "rejoice in all things."  My only response back was a wrong heart "thankful for what?"  However, there was quickly one thing that I could be thankful for and that was that God was the only One who truly knew and could understand the feelings of my heart.  He alone is the Healer of the brokenhearted and promises to be close to the brokenhearted.  I had two options 1) Run AWAY from Him 2) Run TO Him.  And RUN TO Him I did.  I was thankful that it was Thanksgiving break in a few days.  I used Thanksgiving break to battle the despair of my heart with the promises of His Word and Who He is and drowned much of myself into Him.  He renewed me in His strength and hope.  I didn't know HOW, but I did know WHO.  I didn't know WHY, but I knew WHO controlled all things.  I knew that I COULDN'T, but that HE COULD.  So, yes.  I could choose to be thankful.  I am not so much thankful for what happened, but I can praise Who He is and has been in the middle of it all.  1) No matter what happens in life He is a loving Father Who has blessed above that which I deserve.  The blessings are better than I ever deserve and the hard times are better than what I deserve. 2) All things will work together for my good because He alone is good and knows how to give His children good things 3) He alone knows how to get me to the other side of the storm as He is in control of the storm that is allowed.  4) He will make me better and stronger for the journey.
The hardest part of it all is that God has been and still is working on the character and who I am in my heart.  I certainly have not been perfect in all of this.  He is teaching me to love and serve those who have hurt my heart with a true inward sincerity.  This can only be done in relying on His help and strength.  It has served much in learning God sufficiency versus self sufficiency.  God has given me many joyous and wonderful moments with them that have come from His hand alone.  I cannot take the credit.  He is allowing me to show them who I am as a Christian and not just telling them.  He is helping me see all the more the love that He has for me for He loves me and forgives me even in my darkest moments.  In turn, I am called to provide others the same benefits.  Lord, help me to be who You need me to be.  Teach me and show me the way.  For You have placed me on this earth and with these students "for such a time as this."
P.S.  I am thankful also to others for their prayers in helping me fight the enemy and be strong and happy in heart.