Every journey must start somewhere and ultimately every traveler on a journey has a set destination or goal in mind as they begin their travel. Not all journeys are smooth. Not all journeys go as planned. There are often many stops, twists, and turns along the way. In the end, those journeys make for some really good stories to tell, share, and to think of fondly.
I say all of these things in order to say that the life of Christian is no different. The journey of the Christian life begins when the Christian makes a decision to accept Christ as their One and Only means of salvation and Forgiver of their sin. The final destination is, thanks to Him, eternal life in heaven. However, in the years of time in between, is the journey of a lifetime. It is in those years of time that God, the Potter, molds and shapes the lives of His children from who they were into the image of who He has designed for them to be. The journey is not always smooth. However, the hand of God is at work.
I have started to write this blog as a means to share my journey with the Lord as I continue to follow Him on the journey of a lifetime--the journey of being a Woman After God's Own Heart. No. I am not a perfect follower of God. My journey has had many twists, turns, bumps, bruises, wrong ways, U-turns, and any other reference that would fit here. However, that is the beauty of the journey. The perfect Lord has been with me every step of the way and will continue to be until I reach my final heavenly home. He has used the circumstances of life to mold me and create me into a better image of Himself. Praise God that He is not finished with me yet and has not given up on me, even when I want to give up on myself.
Now to get to the reason behind the title of this blog. Here it goes...The last three school years (as I am a teacher), have served the greatest purpose in my 24/25 year Christian life. I do not have the time or space to tell it all. However, three school years ago, I let the circumstances of life draw me daily away from the Lord step by step, slowly. Yes I was still in church. Yes I was still serving. Yes I was still trying to follow the Lord. However, over time I began to get bitter about circumstances and even towards a wonderful God. How could He let these things that were happening happen? Did He even care? I know, silly questions. I felt that He owed me something for all my years of hard work and service. How could He let me down? These sinful questions, attitudes, and thoughts killed my heart and love for my God slowly. I stopped having a devotional time. I started to make little compromises in His commands. My sin no longer touched my heart as it should. My heart started to turn majorly in the wrong direction. Let me say right now--IT WAS NOT GOD. HE DID NOT GO ANYWHERE. I DID.
Praise God, that He loved me His child enough to not let me stay there. He tugged at the strings of my heart two school years ago by allowing me to hear the thoughts of my heart in church one day. I came to realize how far away I was from where I wanted to be with my relationship with God. In fact, I honestly knew it all along. I hid it with a smile. I said the right things trying to hide who I had become. I was a prisoner in my own heart.
Freedom came at last when first I spoke with God for hours in complete honesty of all my feelings and actions. It did not all happen overnight. Freedom also came when I was able to be honest with others in where I had been. At first, I only opened up to two special people in my life--fellow believers who also took my case up to the throne room of God on my behalf. God, my fellow believers, and I together. My journey become a journey of love for God and excitement again. I saw how He was directing my steps and lighting my path back to Him. It was not easy. It took steps of repentance, confession, and hard work. But it was worth it! I couldn't help but begin to share my story and testimony of what the Lord has done and is doing to anyone who would listen. He was/is a Deliverer in so many ways. He set my feet upon His Rock. Not only that, but He has used my experience to help others. No. I am still not perfect. Every day and moment is a decision of Who I will follow and serve. However, God has placed me back together much stronger and better than I began. He has made something beautiful out of my mess. Only God can do that!
I solely believe that God intends for us not to hide the struggles of the Christian life. James 5:16, Galatians 6:2 He intends for us to share both the good and bad of our lives, the strengths and weaknesses. There is freedom in breaking down the walls and just being real with one another. Not in order to judge one another (for we are all guilty of the same things--if not in action--in heart and motive), but to pray for one another in the Christian battle. Then, to celebrate the victory and praise that belong to our God. No person can or should replace God in our lives, but we are the body of Christ to help and support one another. I am thankful for those who have done this for me.
I look forward to blogging my continual journey!
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